Do it the right way—for yourself!

I've made a lot of stupid choices for the sake of weight loss: becoming a vegan without a plan for eating enough protein and taking vitamins; trying the cabbage soup diet; fasting for days; and the biggie—an eating disorder in my late teens and 20s.

But I never tried diet pills, thank goodness. Already made crabby by dieting, I would have been impossible to live with had I tried them.

Good Housekeeping has a great story in its June issue about 5 women who once took diet pills, but only managed to lose the weight when they went on sensible diets with a true commitment for exercise (except one woman with muscular dystrophy who did it on diet alone). One woman in particular had dieted almost constantly since high school taking diet pills and after she had her first child, her husband asked her to lose weight without taking them. I guess he didn't like the potential for health problems or perhaps her mood while taking them.

Also in the article is an excellent essay by Geneen Roth, a recovered food addict whom I've long admired, about dealing with the "Contant Food Critics" in your life. Every person trying to lose weight over time has them. I know I do, but I just try to remember that they care about me and just want me to succeed. But I also wonder, how does their constant criticism affect people's dieting attempts. Those five women trying to lose weight using the pills might have tried them in an attempt to make easier something for which they were being criticized. Who knows, because the articles don't say. But I do think it's really important to remember that the critics love you (probably) and the best thing to say is, "It's my body and I'll decide how to do this."

I do find myself wanting to lose weight in part to satisfy the criticism of others (especially my ex-husband and perhaps an ex=boyfriend or two), but I am forcing myself to only think of myself. For a long time, I didn't understand why needing to please others was a problem in losing weight. Now I do. The reason is that when it comes to making choices, if you aren't making choices because you want to hold yourself accountable but rather are thinking of others at the time, you aren't going to make the same choice. The emotions surrounding your relationship with the other person (acceptance, respect, security, belonging, guilt, etc.) will interfere every time. It's only when you know that you are important enough to take seriously, when you know that you need to do a great job managing your own life and when your ideal is to act from your highest self instead of your emotional, crazy self will you make the right choices.

Here's to loving yourself enough to do it right!